-: life.

{Thursday, February 24, 2011} 12:25 AM

OH HI!

I don't know why I have a feeling to update my blog when I should be sleeping. Anyw I have been sleeping late so yeah.. nothing special. I am so called fine? I don't know am I fully recover arnot. Because I have been telling myself that he don't love me he don't love me...etc But we still meet. Ok, at least I am not that paranoid. At least now I am able to control my thinking & most importantly control myself not to contact him. But for one think I can't control which is help him. I know he needs a jacket as if you are riding bike you will know how cold isit. So bought him jacket. & now is to help him to write appeal letter. 2 appeal letters. I know this might be stupid. My baby girls will say: "WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID TO HELP HIM WHEN HE DON'T EVEN CARE??" but.. once there is love there will be no hate. Even if we can't be lovers at least friends right? Maybe for now I can't help it. but who knows 3 months later I might just hack care.

As for school, same no interest in it. It's like I don't know what am I fighting for. I have been skipping.. sigh. I just feel like telling my mom, stop schooling. But if I stop what am I suppose to do? Work? yeah work... but I know sooner or later I will get bored of work. I keep telling myself.. at least finish up this course. Exams are 2 weeks away. No feel for revision. All In my mind now is HOLIDAYS HOLIDAYS! THAT'S ALL! Next month holidays are lined up with activities. It's bloody first time I am so looking forward for holidays. I mean I always look forward but this time I just feel like skip exams and have my holidays nowwwww!!!!!!!!! another point of having holidays is at least I can run away from some things here. I can enjoy prove to him that I can still be that happy pie. Not just school home, school home. If he can enjoy his life without me SO DO I!

If you watch YU LE BAI FEN BAI, you will know what is this pose means:)