Am I a failure? Am I that useless? This is not the life in 30s I image... Lost as fuck now..
Currently, in my first ever rental house in Auckland. Sitting here thinking about my life choices. about what i want.. which clearly my mind is just confuse as fuck. Perhaps I expect too much, perhaps I'm just not trying hard. Perhaps.... just useless.
Here in Auckland trying to fulfil one of my dreams is to work overseas but things are not looking good. applied 20 over jobs no reply or just rejection. What is wrong with me? & now ... the thoughts of living here is just cloudy. Isnt it what I want? but why am I have second thoughts and regret to start all these? Where is this going? I don't know... I don't know what I want to do in my life and it's just meaningless.